Name Calling...

Another one...Tagged by Suni...

My "tiny tot" has completed an healthy(touchwood) 40 weeks :) (no she is not OUT as yet...)

When we got a confirmation of this "tiny tot", being really really there, it took us couple of dayz to digest it and get used to the idea :) ( and that feeling seems so lonnggggggggggggg ago)
The next step was to break the news to our family...
After the entire checkup...I had spoken to my mum a couple of times...infact I had gone over a couple of times ( and by my actions, mum could make out I was expecting...she didn't ask though) still I didn't know how to tell her.
After the first sonoscan and the cute pictures, I just couldn’t wait to tell my mum, I called up and told her. And the Transcript was something like this:
Mum : Kaisi hai tu?
Me : Main thik hoon mum, aap Kaise ho?
Mum : doctor ne kya bataya hai?
Me : Doctor ne medicines diya hai
Me : aur bolo hai ki sab kuch normal hai
Mum : acha
Me : aur mum, bola hai ki ek baby hai :)
Mum : who toh mujhe pata hai, phele se pata tha :)
Me : {stunned}

Anyways, after that there were and are many conversations involving/about “my baby” and especially with family n closest friends.

I find it quite irritating to use the word “baby” makes it seem like a very distant and some stranger’s kid…(like me asking my colleague, “toh aap ki baby ka naam kya hai?” Or if I all of a sudden forget the kids name, I will ask baby aap ka naam kya hai??)

So here it goes…
Thonnu : that’s the first name that Suraj n I ever gave to our baby
Konnu : the other name we had given our 8 weeks old baby…My mum didn’t like and I realized it sounded more boyish than girlish so I changed.
Shonnu kutty : is reserved for the times when she is extremely active(touchwood) and hyper…kicking around moving around…and I want her to settle down and not be so naughty…
Bumpy : this is when I move my hand on my tummy and feel that there is a huge lump(making the shape of my tummy irregular) I somehow feel its shonnu kutty’s bum and hence the name Bumpy…as in “is this ur bumpy, shonnu kutty?” or “can I bite ur bum, bumpy??”

Lil Person : When she is 'irritatingly' restless (now don't ask me how do I know...I just know...rmbr I m the Mommie :) )

Excuse me : as in "Excuse me can u move a lil to the left??" This is when she has gone far far too the right of my tummy n i feel that my right side is gonna burst open :)

And the hot favorite name:
Mummu : I don’t remember how I coined it (oh I m damn good at it but now I just don’t remember…) besides we both loved the name cos it sounded more girlish…and its stuck with everyone who is close to us, family and friends…it still is the best name as of now, for all seasons and weathers.

After quite some time my mum asked me what if the baby is a boy? So what would you call him?

Me a genius, simple solution :
Ladki hui toh : Mummu di
Ladka hua toh : Mummu da

Or simply…
Ladki hui toh : MuMMu
Ladka hua toh : MuNNu


There the names…and many more to come when she comes…

Winning Theory...

Making her presence felt is more like it. Mummu is gonna be a Libran baby, and true to their characteristics she is this massively show off baby.

U recollect all those flashy tiny tots, who can talk, and you coax them to call you didi, aunty or to say a poem and they would never do it, and just when u turn around, u have this cute voice following ur ears from amidst these huge crowd, whom this tiny tot is eagerly entertaining. Mummu is no less.

Her timings are perfect and the end result, people staring away to glory at this tiny wave so clearly visible on my prominent tummy(I have quit wearing some
of my flashy yet hot short and fitting dresses thanks to the wave)
Mummu (just like me..Thank God and I thut she is carried ONLY Surajs genes) wants to have the last word or to be more precise the last action...

We had a Senior Manager from Korea (from our client site) over for a month for meetings/discussions. I started interacting with him when I was in my 7th
month. Mummu's behavior during this month was more or less subdued, well to wellphrase it, I thut she was a lazy kid (surprise awaits me).
She had a set pattern, the minute she would hear her dad she would be awake and if she didn't hear him, I felt she thought it was time to sleep.
So evenings, when Suraj would come to pick us up, Mummu would be happily playing, kicking around and swimming around. She would be awake as late as 2am with
herself and daddy talking n playing. Mornings she would gimme a couple of kicks to be happy with and then off to sleep. Like a sweet child she would be asleep through most of the day and I could get away with doing a whole load of work.
Couple of weeks in the 7th month, I had a meeting scheduled with this SM, we (3 of us, me another colleague and the SM) occupied a meeting room, we had to really crowd together (at the round table) mainly cos we had just one laptop we had to stare at.
The meeting began, with my colleague starting off on queries and I was listening, the SM was attentive at this point of time listening as well. After about 5 minutes, it was the SM's turn to speak, and speak he did, thankfully (or not) I was sitting at the corner a lil away from the table, giving space to mummu n sitting in a relaxed position.
And suddenly, I felt my tummy moving from one end to another, I thut I dreamt. I was caught so off-guard with the movements, that I got distracted (I was in a meeting rmbr...I had
to take back loads of stuff in my head and then document it).
For a couple of minutes, I couldn't figure out why the movements??? Mummu was sleeping...I could swear by anything...okah I knew I had a good hour to find out what was the movement all about.

I stood up for couple of minutes and the guys realised I wanted a break (so sweet of them).
I went for a walk, sat at my desk for couple of minutes, checked my mail and mummu didn't as much as move an inch. Surprised haan? My theory, She moved cos she likes the foreigner speaking :) now I have to get into the meeting room n prove it...

Alrightie so we went for the meeting again, my Agenda was clear "Aakhir Mummu move kar kyon rahi hai??"
1st Round :My colleague started off the meeting,
Mummus reaction -- No movement
I spoke, Mummus reaction -- No movement
SM spoke, Mummus reaction -- a slight butt wiggling (not so noticeable but it was there)
(Okah... theory proved right once...)
2nd Round :I spoke, Mummus reaction -- No movement
SM spoke, Mummus reaction -- movement...from left to the right (quite prominent)
(Right twice...)
3rd Round (and this is my final observation round):I am quiet...mainly cos I don't want to be distracted and want to prove that my theory is correct.
My colleague spoke and spoke and spoke (he had to explain a huge example with the help of numbers so that went on for a good 10 min..good enough for me),
Mummus reaction -- No movement
SM spoke, Mummus reaction -- movement...
SM paused...Mummu stopped
SM spoke (this time he reiterated that 10 min example) and Mummu moved from left to the right (quite prominent) and I felt I had this tiny tot an professional swimmer inside me, doing
her regular laps.
My reaction...I was staring away at this major show-off put in by my baby...
(Winning theory!!!)

Tagged...By Risha

This one's overdue as well...
Resh tagged me almost 3 months back...Ah better late than Never...
so here are a dozen "did_you_know" list about ME...

1. I am the QUIETEST when I am extremely ANGRY/UPSET. Infact no one would dare talk to me when I am angry it shows so well on my face :)

2. I don't eat, infact I can't eat When I am very Angry.

3. I can't stand bad mannered creatures/kids, esp rude shopkeepers, misbehaving against my parents. I have lashed out BIG time at some aunty who was yelling away to glory at my mom once, that too in our house and infront of me, I literally threw her out of the house (well that was more with words than with actions)

4. I can't stand quiet home/place. During one such stays, away from home, I used to Leave the TV ON through out the night so that I could sleep :)

5. I am a complete FOODIE(ghar ka Khaana) and I can't stand Chocolates. I can very easily give away my share of chocolate/s.

6. I love to surprise friends with gifts and love receiving surprise gifts as well :) and well not necessarily from men :)

7. Love to Try out stylish stuff esp clothes, I am a total spend thrift when it comes to clothes and lipsticks. I still have clothes that are like dated 10 yrs back :) ( ya i should thank mum for maintaining it so well)

8. I have loads of softtoys and ONLY one tweety bird out of the whole lot is something that I bought on my own, otherwise the remaining are gifted.

9. Just like my dad, children in my family are damn scared of me (well no I haven't threatened nor beaten them up...nor has my dad...I think they see the clear_no_nonsense_image of my dad in me... thanks Dad)

10. I would dread going for shaadi/s (When I was single) that means I have missed millions of shaadi of Best of Friends and of Cousins and I can tell you the kind of crap that I have received for not attending them.

11. Breakfast is a very essential meal for me...No Breakfast...Means hungry me...n Hungry me is like absolutely in foul mood...

12. Networking comes naturally to me :)

My Fetish List...

Suni Thanks for this one babe...


I just thought I have to have to write...no matter what...




So here is ma' List!!! wat sayz??


1. When I leave a room (that could be home/office) I turn around n switch-off all the switches, that would mean switching off light, fan, tv for that matter doorbell as well..if this is not less...in the office when I leave the toilet, and I m the last person to leave, I switch off the heater, the lights, the exhausts ;) {not advisable sometimes :) }


2. Any unread/new email in my inbox -- needs to be answered...doesn't matter if the ONLY thing I end up writing is "will mail you later" or "sorry babe/dude very busy now" or "brb" or "ok" or "hmmm". So if I am not replying to YOUR mails that means you need to call me up.


3. Cleaning the house - is like a package of manicure or pedicure ;). means removing those black strands of stubborn sticky dirt that can be ONLY scrubbed off by toothbrush (a used-not-good-for-teeth-thingy), surf and some bleach and disinfectant. It sounds so lavish and elaborate, believe me it is.



4. Something that can NEVER stop me is Music - Good music always shrugs the stiffness off me and makes me dance. In my 7th month of pregnancy, I attended a catholic wedding of a sweet friend, I started dancing the minute I walked into the hall :) and Poor Suraj was pushing ppl away so that I had enough space to dance :)

5. Last but not the Least...good manners is something that really impresses me a). Professionalism at work b). Courteous...that means NOT ONLY with those Pretty ladies but also with your friends and families and esp with your family. and the list goes on...

Pregnancy dayz...

So many days and hardly anything to write….nah …not possible…Actually I started writing a whole load of stuff and then left it half way through. Will pick them up soon and put in neat pointers. So in the mean time, what have I been up to ??? Quite a load of interesting stuff.

1. Getting used to my new project, that includes getting accustomed to work and to know the ppl in the team, our own gang and the Korean clients.
2. Finding an English tutor, for one of the Korean guys. I almost found one, but then the tutor didn’t agree on the fee amount…sad
3. Helping one of the Korean guys to get the recipe for tandoori chicken and also converted that into Korean language
4. The next task in hand is to find a suitable, reasonably cheap and good quality salvar suit for the Korean guys wife :D as of now its just pointing him to the right stores. So scanning my grey cells for good shops.
5. Finding innovative ideas to surprise Sunshine (that’s Su) like sending him Ferrero Rocher through the office ka internal courier. Oh btw FR was gifted by one of the Korean guys (the guy who was looking out for an English teacher)
6. Getting in touch with old college friends on orkut (that is whenever I get access to orkut). I met one of my friends yday after 10 years and it felt like….hmmm…. Nothing…we spoke a lot…and I didn’t feel that I met him after such a huge gap. All I could think of during this time was, he has been married for almost 7.5 years (one of the first guys amongst our college batch to get married)
7. Getting up early, cooking and eating well.
8. Pulling out all those short dresses from the wardrobe and doing a massive mix n match n dorning them these dayz.
9. Attending weddings (which is very surprising cos I change my mind millions of times to go for any weddings or rather to not go for a wedding, be it closest friend or someone the family knows)
10. Generally smiling and being happy and writing mails and smiling and checking out blogs and smiling and dressing up and smiling and dreaming and smiling and smiling (touchwood)

And what I have NOT been upto L
1. Reading newspaper and books(that includes mummu books)
2. to finish crochet lace for mummu
3. exercising(yet to call the doc for antenatal exercises) and going for walks and meditating and spending some time quietly with myself
4. Going to church and praying most importantly(yet to register myself with a church)
5. Not picking up calls on the very first ring and forgetting to return back calls (temporary amnesia during pregnancy)
6. my appraisals till NOW(last day is like 3 days away)
7. to carry the protein milk powder
8. to click the crow-baby pics (there “are”, well actually, there “were” these 3 crow babies lying in a nest right outside our window and I have been planning to click their pic for a long time and I didn’t do it…now they flew away)
9. to pick up something new to learn
10. to go to meet meme(that’s my mom) L

Up to what???

So many days and hardly anything to write….nah …not possible…Actually I started writing a whole load of stuff and then left it half way through. Will pick them up soon and put in neat pointers. So in the mean time, what have I been up to ??? Quite a load of interesting stuff.

1. Getting used to my new project, that includes getting accustomed to work and to know the ppl in the team, our own gang and the Korean clients.
2. Finding an English tutor, for one of the Korean guys. I almost found one, but then the tutor didn’t agree on the fee amount…sad
3. Helping one of the Korean guys to get the recipe for tandoori chicken and also converted that into Korean language
4. The next task in hand is to find a suitable, reasonably cheap and good quality salvar suit for the Korean guys wife :D as of now its just pointing him to the right stores. So scanning my grey cells for good shops.
5. Finding innovative ideas to surprise Sunshine (that’s Suraj) like sending him Ferrero Rocher through the office ka internal courier. Oh btw FR was gifted by one of the Korean guys (the guy who was looking out for an English teacher)
6. Getting in touch with old college friends on orkut (that is whenever I get access to orkut). I met one of my friends yday after 10 years and it felt like….hmmm…. Nothing…we spoke a lot…and I didn’t feel that I met him after such a huge gap. All I could think of during this time was, he has been married for almost 7.5 years (one of the first guys amongst our college batch to get married)
7. Getting up early, cooking and eating well.
8. Pulling out all those short dresses from the wardrobe and doing a massive mix n match n dorning them these dayz.
9. Attending weddings (which is very surprising cos I change my mind millions of times to go for any weddings or rather to not go for a wedding, be it closest friend or someone the family knows)
10. Generally smiling and being happy and writing mails and smiling and checking out blogs and smiling and dressing up and smiling and dreaming and smiling and smiling (touchwood)

And what I have NOT been upto L
1. Reading newspaper and books(that includes mummu books)
2. to finish crochet lace for mummu
3. exercising(yet to call the doc for antenatal exercises) and going for walks and meditating and spending some time quietly with myself
4. Going to church and praying most importantly(yet to register myself with a church)
5. Not picking up calls on the very first ring and forgetting to return back calls (temporary amnesia during pregnancy)
6. my appraisals till NOW(last day is like 3 days away)
7. to carry the protein milk powder
8. to click the crow-baby pics (there “are”, well actually, there “were” these 3 crow babies lying in a nest right outside our window and I have been planning to click their pic for a long time and I didn’t do it…now they flew away)
9. to pick up something new to learn
10. to go to meet meme(that’s my mom) L

And the culprit is…

10th May, 2007
Doctors weighing scale shows 64.7 kgs (my weighing scale reads 63.5)

16th June, 2007
Doctors weighing scale shows 68.4 kgs (my weighing scale reads 67.5)
The nurse asked me to stand on the weighing machine, read the bold flashy 68.4kgs, recorded it in my file, went back to the first page of the file, saw my weight for the month of May, looked at me, smiled and said we have to weigh you again. I stood again on the weighing machine and the same…68.4 kgs no difference of even 0.1 kgs sad eh!!!

Gosh…I have gained almost 4 kgs… in a months time…I think to myself. The Doctor looked at me alarmed and asked “what do you eat?”
I ask myself, what do I eat? I told the doctor, “I am very particular about what I eat these days, I don’t go out to eat, I cook at home and eat dal chaaval roti bhaaji milk nuts fruits apple pear”
And then the doctor added “banana Mango?”
And Suraj said “Mango…that too everyday”
And I sighed
And the Doctor said “no more mangoes”
And Suraj added “just one mango in 1 or 2 weeks”
And the doctor said “ok but see to it that your weight doesn’t increase too much. So much weight is not good for health”

So the culprit are these yellowish, just ripe, a bit firm, juicy, delicious, yummy, sweetishly sour or sourly sweet mmmmmmmmmmmaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggggggoooooooooooeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssssss
and sadly I m off them as well :(

Precious 45 minutes…

22nd May, 2007


The surprise of being pregnant has all but disappeared as far as I am concerned but still draws curious looks from friends(who know that I am pregnant) and colleagues/coworkers(who are slowly discovering it, or sweet gossips have been already whispered in their ears and they are just confirming it) . For me and Suraj, this has been replaced by the joy and anxiety of a tiny tot arriving soon in this world, and the affection and care that She (I still have a strong intuition that the baby is a girl…Say a loud “Amen” to that) would need.



I am like 5 months pregnant now, and my good old reliable link
http://pregnancy.about.com/cs/pregnancycalendar/l/blweek22.htm (thanks again Ketan...I can never thank you enough for this) speaks volumes about what the baby is like on what week. Follow the link to see what the baby looks like and is capable of doing when he/she is 22 weeks old.



QUOTE

Beginning of Part I: Its 7:45 pm

Doctor : Please let me take the measurements and I will explain you everything.
Me : hmmm ok (disappointingly smiling)
Doctor types : HEAD (and then after sometime) ABDOMEN
Me thinking : is that really the abdomen?
Doctor types : FEMUR (and then after sometime) HUMUS
Me thinking : that should be the legs. Is this doctor gonna just go on typing or what?
Doctor Speaks : (me thinking : Thank God) you see that?
Me Says : yes, that’s the heart pumping (me thinks, so ferociously??)
Doctor Speaks again : There are 4 chambers clearly visible
Me thinks : 2 auricles and 2 ventricles. How about the blood flow is that normal?
Doctor Silently adjusting some setting, and checks for the blood flow.
Doctor Speaks : normal flow of blood in and out of the heart
Doctor Speaks : you see that??
Me Speaks : Ya the thumb going in the mouth
Doctor Speaks : see that, clasping and unclasping of hand. See that curling and uncurling of fist.
Doctor Exclaims : oh no?
Me thinks : what now??
Doctor exasperated
Doctor Requests : can you please pass urine and come back?
Me thinks : more than happy to do that
End of Part I : Its already 8:00 pm


Beginning of Part II: Its 8:05 pm

Doctor Speaks : see that again??
Me speaks : yes, thumb sucking (me also smiles J , me also has tiniest of tiny tear in my eyes)
Doctor exasperated again and also being disturbed by his subordinate.
Doctor Speaks (a lil relieved) : there you see, that’s the backbone.
Me thinks : you mean Spinal Cord. Not bad haan, my knowledge of biological names for the anatomy. Me pleased.
Doctor Requests : please turn to your left.
Me obeys
Doctor Speaks : oh No. siggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Me thinks : ahhhhhh stop sighing man.
Doctor speaks : lets wait for 2 minutes
Me speaks : alright
End of Part II: Its now 8:15pm



Beginning of Part III: Its 8:17 pm
Doctor speaks : Ok
Me speaks : Ok
Doctor sighs again.
Me concerned : Anything wrong doctor?
Doctor speaks : I cann’t see the face. I got a picture of the lateral view. I have saved the image of the profile, but I can’t see the face.
Me questioning : what? (me smiles proudly too)
Doctor Speaks again : I have a clear picture of the backbone (I think, u mean Spinal cord), but the face has not being captured in totality. I am sorry.
Me gets off the table smiling.
End of Part III: 8:30pm and its all done.

UNQUOTE



Everything said between the QUOTE and UNQUOTE actually was Mummu’s first 45 minutes of fame and glory on the monitor of the sonoscan device. That was also mine and Surajs, first, one on one with a 5 month old tiny tot and I think she is notorious.



The doctor’s exasperation actually tickled my funny bone; I was smiling away every time he sighed. Why? I don’t know. May be somewhere deep down I feel Mummu is more like Suraj than me. The ONLY difference between mine and Suraj’s natures, I have an upper edge as far as my stubbornness is concerned. Her sonoscan proved that she is stubborn; she refused to turn around despite the fact that she was disturbed so much. End tak face nahin dikhaya J



I think she obliges more to her dads request than to mine, so conclusion, both of them are notorious.



Before the sonoscan started, Suraj went on and on that Mummu is a thumb sucker. There, the minute she was visible on the monitor, she refused to let go off her hands, she was clasping and unclasping, she removed her thumb from the mouth and again the thumb went back in.



At first, she was happily playing away with her hands and when the focus was changed to her legs, she was kicking away to glory (Thank God for her kicks) then she swirled away, gave us a good sight of her feet and then a good picture of her back and after that, it was like “do whatever you want, I m not looking at you all.”
OR
I somehow feel, Mummu thought, I was going off to sleep and hence she swirled around and she was lying on her stomach. I am imagining, this cute chubby cheeked, thumb in mouth baby, lying on her stomach -- facing my spinal cord, as if hugging me and sleeping.



Everything about the sonoscan just makes my faith stronger ……….NO………..Strongest, as far as Miracles are concerned. I don’t have words to describe it. It’s just



Fun and fears

My eyes filled with tears

Joy and anxiety

My life’s changing daily



A tiny tot

With her pranks and shots,

A Small Wonder

To her my love’s Surrendered.

I got kicked…

Dated : 19th April, 2007
Last night amidst the inconvenience n discomfort of my sleeping position…whilst I was trying to catch up on 40 winks…(its actually reduced from a snoring deep sleep to deep breathless 40 winks)…
I realized…the reason I wasn’t able to sleep soundly is cos…in the earnest attempt to be comfortable…I slept a bit on my tummy.,..though not completely ….so I tried to slowly turn on my back…I did....n I felt that was comfortable enuf….i began swimming in this ocean of darkness…n thut sleep is finally conquering me….but alas…I realized there were these prominent grumbling noises that my stomachs started making…I thut might be my dream or might not be anything at all. but then now I m so used to the stomach growling n grumbling all the time its normal…afterall 4 months of pregnancy lets u know…that ur body is not urs anymore…it teaches you these facts slowly…but consistently…everyday is like a new chapter…a day of learnings…n questions…..ok I got diverted….

So back to the grumblings. I realized if I had gas(which is a very common thing when u r expecting) my entire upper part of the stomach shud grumble…not only a side. Luckily it wasn’t on my left side..i wud hv shivered with fear, thinking my hearts gonna pop out. So it was to my right, a prominent thump…it cudn’t hv been my heart….then again a thump…is it some nerves…again a thump…is it a cramp…n then a thump….finally I had the good sense(in my 40 winks sleep) to check out my tummy with my hands…I kept my hand gently on my tummy…n a thump…n one more n one more…n I realized probably I m dreaming…then I just pulled surajs hand n kept it on my tummy…n he felt the thump …n again…n again. He was the first one to say “she is kicking”…yes our baby was kicking last night…n thankfully both of us experienced it….its an amazing feeling. I don’t rmbr distinctly when I could first make out the baby’s prominent heartbeat(else I would have written an expert on that as well) but I was praying that when the baby kicks for the very first time, I shouldn’t be missing out on it. God has been kind enough in answering my prayers. Experience of a lifetime.

Yes, I could make out the baby kicking even in my sleep, mainly cos I hv been reading this book on pregnancy, tells u what a first time mothers shud know. These nitty-grittys are probably missed out on by ur loved ones, esp ur mom, they rmbr only when u tell them abt ur experience…n then they iterate their experience. I guess I was waiting for it to happen…or might say I was pushing my baby to kick..to show me some signs..to get me out of my low mood…its her way of saying..”hey I m arnd…don’t worry”


Well quite contrary to what the subject says….its the most amazing thingy…

10 Point something...

It’s the 19the week and now mummu is busy and active with all her tantrums (there she kicked me :) ) I ain’t complaining. Wonderful 19 weeks and still more to come.
I have been keeping myself up to date, reading books(which honestly I have stopped reading) checking out this link http://pregnancy.about.com/cs/pregnancycalendar/l/blweek19.htm (which I do it quite religiously), and this is where I came across “10 tips for Dads” obviously this link was intended for dads who are abroad(but nevertheless useful tips). Check out this link http://pregnancy.about.com/cs/forfathersonly/a/tippregdad.htm

Well you will get the tips here as well if you just read on…
1. Rub her feet. Doing a hand or foot massage can help relieve a lot of tension and give you some quiet time to talk. I prefer using a mint lotion on my feet to help invigorate myself. Ask her what he preference is for lotion.
2. Clean the bathroom. This might sound like something that is very low priority but who wants to throw up in a dirty toilet? This is one of the best things my husband does for me!
3. Show interest. Yes, you're discussing baby names for the umpteenth time, but it's important to her and ultimately you. Go to appointments when you can, if you have trouble getting away be sure to make it to the big ones like the first heartbeat and the ultrasounds.
4. Take her out to dinner. Don't forget date night! Sometimes it seems like your fetus has taken over your life months before it gets here. Remember to spend time as a couple.
5. Take childbirth classes. Don't worry about turning green or looking silly. These classes will help you tremendously once she's in labor. A good class should prepare you for anything along the way. It also gives you a chance to ask questions.
6. Fill the gas tank. Sounds silly, but the fumes can make her feel ill and aren't good for her or your baby. This small act of kindness will go along way.
7. Read a book. It doesn't have to be a high tech serious book, but showing her you have interests on your own about the pregnancy can ease her fears. Not to mention reading can give you an edge up and provide you with some talking points for future conversations. There are also many websites designed for dads.
8. Let her nap! If mom is exhausted an hour nap when she comes home can make a world of difference, as could sleeping in on the weekend. You might even take it one step further and provide breakfast in bed.
9. Feel the baby. You've heard it more than once, "Just put your hand right here…" All of sudden she reports that the baby has stopped moving now. Try resting your hand on her belly during TV time or while you're laying in bed. (Ask first!) Chances are the longer you leave it there the more likely you are to be rewarded with the thumps and flutters she so longs for you to feel.
10. Keep things running smoothly. This can a variety of things from helping to pay the bills, without complaining, to arranging childcare for an afternoon off. Allow her some alone time where she can relax and do what she wants, shop, read, nap, swim, etc. By helping to ensure small things don't fall by the wayside you will make the household a happier one.
Counter points to the above 10 points are the 10 things that I appreciate My hubby darling does for me and I believe any Dad should do for the mothers_to_be:

1. Filled Bucket in the loo
The need and urgency to go to the loo is tried and tested during pregnancy and everything and anything can irritate you. Infact the need and urgency to empty your bladder is inversely proportional to the speed of the lift, the distance between you and the loo, the time of the day and so many other things. And the last thing that you would want to realise is that there is no water...which is quite possible at times...knowing that there are load sheddings and power cuts so often.
2. Picking up heavy stuff and that means my purse at times
A ladies purse is like one of those massive jungles where in you will always find place to dump things…but if you need to fetch something out of it you will never find things at the right time and also when it is much required. My purse at times can have everything that anyone would need and at the same time will be damn heavy. Without a word Suraj would always volunteer to carry it, even now…I have never heard him complain about it…that makes life easier
3. Rubbing my back
Moms_to_be : Your back doesn’t remain yours at all…for that matter none of the body part does, but "The back" is the most sensitive part…cos I being one of the back-sleepers(someone who likes to sleep on her back)...i find it extremely difficult and irresistible to not be able to sleep on my back now…and if I do, the ordeal of lying awake with this terrible pain is unbearable…n unthinkable…(unthinkable cos rmbr there is a baby inside...so for the sake of the baby atleast the blood circulation needs to be proper...and sleeping on one's back is NOT healthy at all)
Suraj started off with the back rubs quite early on…and its reached to an extent that even if I take his hand to any part of my body(hands legs back head) now(as in when he is wide awake) or in his deepest sleep he will end up rubbing it for me….for that matter even if I want him to feel the baby kick…he ends up rubbing my stomach :) (so sweet)
4. Sharing household chores
Household chores seem too mundane and all of a sudden require so much effort that it is unbearable. Washing utensils, washing clothes(so what if it means barely walking 10 steps grab the clothes and putting them in the washing machine) drying clothes, cooking, cleaning the house….and sometimes taking bath is too much to ;) . And Suraj does it all for me (advantages of staying alone)
5. Midnight snacks or shall I say Dawn b’fast
My first trimester saw me hogging away to glory during the early mornings between 2 am and 5 am (well actually esp thru the early mornings). The first time it happened, both me and Suraj were a lil puzzled as to what I could eat so late in the night or early in the morning, after much deliberation and loads of discussion so early on, Suraj decided to give me cold milk and some khaaris and from then on its been the same, though my craving for early morning snacks has now subsided. In all these getting up and getting off the bed I have never heard him complain no matter what.
6. Helping hand
I no more have to extend my hand to ask for Surajs…his extended hand is always there…be it me trying to get off the bean bag or get off the bed. Before I stretch or extend my hands to pick anything or anyone or to pick myself…Suraj would say “Wait I will come over and help you”. He wouldn’t let me pick up things cos I m not supposed to be bending over.
7. Medications and prohibited food
Having/trying to have medications is a huge task as far as I am concerned. I am perpetually running away from medications. I pretend to go off to sleep or hide my medicines but Suraj without fail ensures that if I don’t hv it willingly…its forced down my throat. Coffee in access is a big no no…(Scientific reasoning : Caffenine hampers the iron consumption in blood...and iron is something very essential for the baby) He ensures that I have a bit of it in the morning that’s it. Confirmation with the doctor is the first thing that he does if he finds that I have craving for something that he thinks/knows is very heaty.
8. Comforts
Extra pillows, bottle of chilled water, packet of milk, fruits, coconut water, hot water bag…u name it we have it. To make traveling convenient now we have our very own CAR...
9. Hugs and kisses
I love attention and its never enough…(my friends will back this one) Suraj seems to know/gauge if I want a hug or a peck and he does that…this is the best part of having a loving partner around.
10. Talk to the baby
Most important...He talks and feels the baby moving and sometimes puts the baby to sleep(by talking to her) and that’s the most blissful thing and wakes her up and plays imaginery cricket with her. The bonding between the Father and baby is there, another bliss.

and for all of this I would always be thankful to Suraj...My Sunshine...

Just when we thought a new life had started for us…

I and Suraj have been married now for just about 2 months and were settling slowly into a life of a married couple. The ordeal of getting past the first month, I mean the ordeal of getting things for the home, keeping the home spic n span, all these, adds to ones fatigues. I am lucky that Suraj does seem to understand that these ordeals are not meant for me alone so together we faced these times. Amidst my falling ill and wondering what would be the reason of illness, life was just passing by, when one fine day; Suraj comes home with this thought that I might be pregnant. This fine day happens to be some time in early weeks of February. We planned to take a test on our own. The next morning I took the test and somehow felt that what I was staring at (those two dark pink lines) was NOT true. How could I be pregnant??? I have been married for just abt a month. Well but then facts of life don’t change do they???

We decided to consult a gynaec. She immediately put me on medications, folic acid, must have during the initial months, prescribed for the better development of baby’s spinal cord. I still had my doubts, though I quietly accepted the medications(u just cann’t take chances). Food is a must, but how do I eat food, I couldn’t cook cos I couldn’t stand the smell, I couldn’t stand outside food cos of the smell. Everything revolved arnd the smell thing so I thought. Since I didn’t eat I obviously fell weak, weaker and weakest by the day. Soon enough I had fevers at night so it was best to visit the doc again. This time around we went on 20th Feb which was couple of weeks after our first visit to the gynae. This time around too the doc did some routine checkups and as an after thought she checked my weight and realized that the first time I came in I was 60 kgs and then on 20th feb I was 57 kgs. Losing 3 kgs in a span of 2 weeks, wow it has never happened with me earlier. Ok, so this was bad…finally the doctor was like you have to eat you have to drink milk you have to just think about the baby. Then, the doctor seems to have conveniently forgotten that we need to know the expected due date as well,

and we said “Doctor, when would be the baby due?”
she said “oh didn’t I tell you the dates?”
and we said “No doctor”
she said “oh when was your last periods?”
I was like “20th Dec” (btw that is like 7 good days before me and Suraj got married).

So then she calculates and tells me “your EDD is anywhere between 27th Sep to 1st week of October” (for some reason I keep telling everyone its 1st week of October… intuition I guess J)
Then the gynae stopped looked at me and said “well looks like you are already 8 weeks pregnant, good enough time for you to go and get your sonography done”
I was like “ are you sure doctor”
and she must have thought “God, some gals think that they are the first ones to get pregnant” J

Ok, as I and Suraj walked back home from the docs clinic we decided to go for the sonography just the next day, that is the 21st of Feb.

I somehow believe that if you don’t know how things are/will turn out you are always left awed. That’s exactly what happened to both of us. We went for sonography and I think we looked the happiest couple amongst the whole lot who had come there. For some reason all the women gathered there had a small/big bottle of bisleri. And I was thinking to myself, hey its just February now, but look at these women how coolly they are gulping down litres of water. I was soon to realize that I too will have a bottle of bisleri. My name was called. Did you ever wonder or imagine somebody calling you with the title of Mrs??? I never did, but it sometimes feels nice and sometimes is overbearing. Till now I have ONLY felt better. So I go to see the doctor and Suraj decides to sit out. She tells me please go and drink lots of water well she actually said it like this “jab tak peshab jor se nahin aaye tab tak pani piyo” meaning “till the time you don’t feel like urinating heavily, till then keep drinking water” (there the secret of women carrying so many bottles of bisleri was revealed).

I drank almost 1.5 litres of water, still nothing. And after even 1 hour there was absolutely no feeling, even remotely that too, to go to the lu for Peeshaab. The doctor called me, and I stupidly told her I don’t think there is anything. She told me “come let me check”. Isn’t it funny how our doctors treat the patients? They expect the patient to KNOW everything about their treatment, WITHOUT the doctors providing any information, thanks for bollywood or else I would have thought the doctor is going to cut me open then n there n I will have no time to think what will happen next. She coolly says “idhar leto, pet aap ka pillow pur hona chahiye” ok so lemme tell u all. It was one of those small narrow beds covered with something black rexin sort of a material with the small pillow kept right in the center. Then she puts the monitor on and types in my name. This was the first time I got an opportunity to put my name as Pushpa Suraj not to forget the Mrs part. Well then she takes this instrument, before that she puts some cold gel over my tummy(ofcourse I m smart enough to wear salwar kurta and go, so up goes the kurta and down goes the salwar). She starts moving the instrument on my tummy and there she shows me on the monitor, a sac (which obviously is my uterus) and then loads of urine. She tells me “because of the urine I am not able to clearly see the uterus”. And I think “aaying I drink 1.5 litres of water and spent 1 hour to exactly achieve this so what happened?” The doctor coolly says “aap ka urine sac full hai, aap jaeye aur urine kijeye” I m like what??? Well you need to obey the doctors don’t you. So I went did sussu came out refreshed. I couldn’t believe something that I should have been able to tell the doctor “that mujhe sussu aayee hai” the doctor was telling me instead. Oh the sonography was not over as yet. After that I was again told to lie down in the same position but before that I was asked coolly to remove my salvar and panty. I obeyed again. Just after I lied down, the doctor was holding this another instrument which sort of looked like those hi-fi toothbrushes, which obviously the doctor thought I knew would be inserted inside me(remember that’s the reason why I had to remove my panty’s too) and all I got as information was “ye thoda thanda lage ga aur uncomfortable bhi”. I was thinking to myself “what do you mean, thanda and uncomfortable?” well before I could voice out my objection as to I need time to prepare myself, that toothbrush like thing was inside of me (tell you these are the times when you realize Indians are fast). And there on the monitor I could clearly see my no-urine uterus. The doctor smiles (that is in the past 45 minutes she has smiled twice, I am grateful to her), and she smiles cos she has a reason. She says “your baby is naughty refuses to show” I think “my baby?? Refuses to show???” Happy realization, here I am for sonography still surprised about the fact that I might be pregnant. That thought didn’t last long she made an appearance and the doctor jumps out saying “there u see, your baby” and I see this blurred 1 cm diameter circular thing that was my baby, the baby disappears, doc says “your baby is playing hide n seek” I think “thank God, just like me”. Doctor says “lets check the heart beat” I m still glued to the monitor and there was the tiniest dot blinking away and for a minute I thut it was the cursor, I was wondering a cursor blinking away so rapidly but then I saw the doctor pointing it out to me “your baby’s heart beat, baby is healthy and fine”. And whoever said that the first impression the first image the first feel of your baby and you would forget all the pains in the world, well it is so true. For a minute I forgot there was something poked inside of me to see this view, that I have been falling ill on n off, that I can barely walk 5 minutes without complaining of backache, I totally forgot. I had a couple of tear drops in my eyes, I stretched my hand as if I could feel my baby on the monitor (doctor must have thought arey baba bacha tumhare pet main hai) and with a small voice I requested the doctor “can my husband also please see it?” and she called out “Suraj please come in”. Suraj came in probably scared, but then the doctor repeated the same thing ”baby is fine, a strong heart beat, just take care and eat healthy”. I was mesmerized by the whole thing and wanted it to last for about half n hour, believe me it was done in 5 minutes or less, I think Suraj knew it wouldn’t take that long, he just saw the monitor thanked the doctor and went out(later Suraj enquired as to what part on the monitor was the baby’s heartbeat? And I knew it he was too taken aback by the whole thing to realize what was what? I hope he did see the small blinking thing…he claims he did…n I think he is just too scared to confess that he didn’t see). Before I realized the toothbrush instrument was out of me and I was asked to step down and get dressed. I was still a zombie, well shouldn’t I be? I am a confirmed 100% mother already, since I saw the baby’s heartbeat. I was pregnant…even when I stepped out of that kingfisher flight that brought us back from Cochin to Mumbai, I was pregnant … when I took the test, I was pregnant… when I fell ill, and now 100% sure I m…after the blinking heartbeat.

Till the time I went for the sonography it was all about me as a new bride(rmbr I m still a 2 month newly wed bride) and all of a sudden the focus has changed both mine and Suraj’s, its all about another new life, Our baby…mummu….we hope the baby is a gal hence the name, but even if the baby is a boy, we just pray the new life is healthy.