Just when we thought a new life had started for us…

I and Suraj have been married now for just about 2 months and were settling slowly into a life of a married couple. The ordeal of getting past the first month, I mean the ordeal of getting things for the home, keeping the home spic n span, all these, adds to ones fatigues. I am lucky that Suraj does seem to understand that these ordeals are not meant for me alone so together we faced these times. Amidst my falling ill and wondering what would be the reason of illness, life was just passing by, when one fine day; Suraj comes home with this thought that I might be pregnant. This fine day happens to be some time in early weeks of February. We planned to take a test on our own. The next morning I took the test and somehow felt that what I was staring at (those two dark pink lines) was NOT true. How could I be pregnant??? I have been married for just abt a month. Well but then facts of life don’t change do they???

We decided to consult a gynaec. She immediately put me on medications, folic acid, must have during the initial months, prescribed for the better development of baby’s spinal cord. I still had my doubts, though I quietly accepted the medications(u just cann’t take chances). Food is a must, but how do I eat food, I couldn’t cook cos I couldn’t stand the smell, I couldn’t stand outside food cos of the smell. Everything revolved arnd the smell thing so I thought. Since I didn’t eat I obviously fell weak, weaker and weakest by the day. Soon enough I had fevers at night so it was best to visit the doc again. This time around we went on 20th Feb which was couple of weeks after our first visit to the gynae. This time around too the doc did some routine checkups and as an after thought she checked my weight and realized that the first time I came in I was 60 kgs and then on 20th feb I was 57 kgs. Losing 3 kgs in a span of 2 weeks, wow it has never happened with me earlier. Ok, so this was bad…finally the doctor was like you have to eat you have to drink milk you have to just think about the baby. Then, the doctor seems to have conveniently forgotten that we need to know the expected due date as well,

and we said “Doctor, when would be the baby due?”
she said “oh didn’t I tell you the dates?”
and we said “No doctor”
she said “oh when was your last periods?”
I was like “20th Dec” (btw that is like 7 good days before me and Suraj got married).

So then she calculates and tells me “your EDD is anywhere between 27th Sep to 1st week of October” (for some reason I keep telling everyone its 1st week of October… intuition I guess J)
Then the gynae stopped looked at me and said “well looks like you are already 8 weeks pregnant, good enough time for you to go and get your sonography done”
I was like “ are you sure doctor”
and she must have thought “God, some gals think that they are the first ones to get pregnant” J

Ok, as I and Suraj walked back home from the docs clinic we decided to go for the sonography just the next day, that is the 21st of Feb.

I somehow believe that if you don’t know how things are/will turn out you are always left awed. That’s exactly what happened to both of us. We went for sonography and I think we looked the happiest couple amongst the whole lot who had come there. For some reason all the women gathered there had a small/big bottle of bisleri. And I was thinking to myself, hey its just February now, but look at these women how coolly they are gulping down litres of water. I was soon to realize that I too will have a bottle of bisleri. My name was called. Did you ever wonder or imagine somebody calling you with the title of Mrs??? I never did, but it sometimes feels nice and sometimes is overbearing. Till now I have ONLY felt better. So I go to see the doctor and Suraj decides to sit out. She tells me please go and drink lots of water well she actually said it like this “jab tak peshab jor se nahin aaye tab tak pani piyo” meaning “till the time you don’t feel like urinating heavily, till then keep drinking water” (there the secret of women carrying so many bottles of bisleri was revealed).

I drank almost 1.5 litres of water, still nothing. And after even 1 hour there was absolutely no feeling, even remotely that too, to go to the lu for Peeshaab. The doctor called me, and I stupidly told her I don’t think there is anything. She told me “come let me check”. Isn’t it funny how our doctors treat the patients? They expect the patient to KNOW everything about their treatment, WITHOUT the doctors providing any information, thanks for bollywood or else I would have thought the doctor is going to cut me open then n there n I will have no time to think what will happen next. She coolly says “idhar leto, pet aap ka pillow pur hona chahiye” ok so lemme tell u all. It was one of those small narrow beds covered with something black rexin sort of a material with the small pillow kept right in the center. Then she puts the monitor on and types in my name. This was the first time I got an opportunity to put my name as Pushpa Suraj not to forget the Mrs part. Well then she takes this instrument, before that she puts some cold gel over my tummy(ofcourse I m smart enough to wear salwar kurta and go, so up goes the kurta and down goes the salwar). She starts moving the instrument on my tummy and there she shows me on the monitor, a sac (which obviously is my uterus) and then loads of urine. She tells me “because of the urine I am not able to clearly see the uterus”. And I think “aaying I drink 1.5 litres of water and spent 1 hour to exactly achieve this so what happened?” The doctor coolly says “aap ka urine sac full hai, aap jaeye aur urine kijeye” I m like what??? Well you need to obey the doctors don’t you. So I went did sussu came out refreshed. I couldn’t believe something that I should have been able to tell the doctor “that mujhe sussu aayee hai” the doctor was telling me instead. Oh the sonography was not over as yet. After that I was again told to lie down in the same position but before that I was asked coolly to remove my salvar and panty. I obeyed again. Just after I lied down, the doctor was holding this another instrument which sort of looked like those hi-fi toothbrushes, which obviously the doctor thought I knew would be inserted inside me(remember that’s the reason why I had to remove my panty’s too) and all I got as information was “ye thoda thanda lage ga aur uncomfortable bhi”. I was thinking to myself “what do you mean, thanda and uncomfortable?” well before I could voice out my objection as to I need time to prepare myself, that toothbrush like thing was inside of me (tell you these are the times when you realize Indians are fast). And there on the monitor I could clearly see my no-urine uterus. The doctor smiles (that is in the past 45 minutes she has smiled twice, I am grateful to her), and she smiles cos she has a reason. She says “your baby is naughty refuses to show” I think “my baby?? Refuses to show???” Happy realization, here I am for sonography still surprised about the fact that I might be pregnant. That thought didn’t last long she made an appearance and the doctor jumps out saying “there u see, your baby” and I see this blurred 1 cm diameter circular thing that was my baby, the baby disappears, doc says “your baby is playing hide n seek” I think “thank God, just like me”. Doctor says “lets check the heart beat” I m still glued to the monitor and there was the tiniest dot blinking away and for a minute I thut it was the cursor, I was wondering a cursor blinking away so rapidly but then I saw the doctor pointing it out to me “your baby’s heart beat, baby is healthy and fine”. And whoever said that the first impression the first image the first feel of your baby and you would forget all the pains in the world, well it is so true. For a minute I forgot there was something poked inside of me to see this view, that I have been falling ill on n off, that I can barely walk 5 minutes without complaining of backache, I totally forgot. I had a couple of tear drops in my eyes, I stretched my hand as if I could feel my baby on the monitor (doctor must have thought arey baba bacha tumhare pet main hai) and with a small voice I requested the doctor “can my husband also please see it?” and she called out “Suraj please come in”. Suraj came in probably scared, but then the doctor repeated the same thing ”baby is fine, a strong heart beat, just take care and eat healthy”. I was mesmerized by the whole thing and wanted it to last for about half n hour, believe me it was done in 5 minutes or less, I think Suraj knew it wouldn’t take that long, he just saw the monitor thanked the doctor and went out(later Suraj enquired as to what part on the monitor was the baby’s heartbeat? And I knew it he was too taken aback by the whole thing to realize what was what? I hope he did see the small blinking thing…he claims he did…n I think he is just too scared to confess that he didn’t see). Before I realized the toothbrush instrument was out of me and I was asked to step down and get dressed. I was still a zombie, well shouldn’t I be? I am a confirmed 100% mother already, since I saw the baby’s heartbeat. I was pregnant…even when I stepped out of that kingfisher flight that brought us back from Cochin to Mumbai, I was pregnant … when I took the test, I was pregnant… when I fell ill, and now 100% sure I m…after the blinking heartbeat.

Till the time I went for the sonography it was all about me as a new bride(rmbr I m still a 2 month newly wed bride) and all of a sudden the focus has changed both mine and Suraj’s, its all about another new life, Our baby…mummu….we hope the baby is a gal hence the name, but even if the baby is a boy, we just pray the new life is healthy.